SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Chapters Read: 16-20

I was a bit harsh in my last post, sure, but eh it is what it is. I guess the message isn't terrible, and perhaps I took it too literally and/or seriously. But I just generally find the implications of like, simply teaming up with everyone for the sake of peace or progress is a little bit over the top. Not everyone must be best friends and live in perfect harmony. That's also not to suggest there should be hostile conflict either. But what's ultimately the idea here? For everyone to live identical lifestyles, and have the same exact preferences? Is that what we're really after? Does that not seem strange? I feel that, as long as basic human dignity is respected, and nobody is actively trying to hurt others etc, why not let everyone just live?

I mean in a perfect world we all just eat food, respect each other, live happily ever after etc. But should we all just be pure cloned monks, living in temples? In a way seeking peace and understanding in a determined, borderline aggressive way, seems rather odd doesn't it? I'm not suggesting the story and characters in Cirque Du Freak are promoting that but I don't know. Kurda being praised as like this wise anti-war being, and Evanna bringing the clans together by having children with both clans.... Eh. Sounds a lot like that's suggesting cultures shouldn't be preserved or whatever.

I guess that's not a terrible message. Like, fundamentally that doesn't truly enrage me. But I simply find it pretty unrealistic. It's also easy to claim that's the right way to do things when a tense situation or threat isn't right on your doorstep.

There's something strange about demanding peace at all costs you know? It's like no matter what happens, what disrespect occurs, what crimes occur, no matter the circumstance, let's just all hug each other and do some paperwork. Additionally, pushing for peace 24/7 kinda suggests that someone is right or wrong. I mean I love a compromise as much as the next guy, but are we talking infinite compromises? Infinite erosion, infinite skimming of tradition? That's where things get shaky.

I find variety and differences between people fascinating, natural, and beautiful.

Anyway, that's essentially an extension of my last post.

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All of that aside, these final chapters were beautiful and thought provoking in a much cooler, fun way. I really enjoyed it. I can't believe it's over!

Darren entering Mr. Tiny's home was pretty wild. Besides the lack of books, it was pretty cool to imagine being amongst the art work and history. A really cool concept. For such an evil being (as many may assume), seems a bit odd to have such an appreciation for humanity....hmmm.....

Darren being turned into a Little Person and sent back in time to the first time he visited the Cirque Du Freak was just.... powerful. Clever. Magical. If I think about it, throughout books 10-12, about half of that content felt like a total full blown fantasy series. It's always been fantasy but, I'm talking about a whole different variety of fantasy.

Evanna and Mr. Tiny's complicated relationship is so interesting. It's so easy to hate Mr. Tiny, but on multiple occasions throughout the series his brilliance shines through and even brief moments of likeable traits are put on display. Mr. Tiny truly embodies the chaos, and randomness of the universe. He truly works in mysterious ways.

The closest Darren ever came to really understanding Mr. Tiny must have come from Evanna and Mr. Tall I feel. Even then, Evanna and Mr. Tall certainly are not operating remotely on the same level as Mr. Tiny.

Darren and Evanna think they're tricking Mr. Tiny, but I'm not so sure....

There's certainly holes in some of my theories here, but I'm starting to look at Mr. Tiny in a whole different light. He's absolutely a menace, but I am still intrigued by him.

I keep recalling in book seven when Mr. Tiny mentions four chances to kill the Vampaneze Lord/win the war. He also mentions a fifth chance, but sort of doesn't fully take it seriously as he didn't feel it was likely to occur.

I think this fifth chance was precisely Darren defeating Steve, and sacrificing himself. Consequentially, coincidentally, conveniently, who is there in the absence of Darren and Steve?

VANCHA AND GANNEN PEOPLE.

I mean, it all feels like a strange test. Evanna and Mr. Tiny both sort of repeat over and over again, just how hopeless it all is for Darren, and winning means destruction etc. Becoming the Lord of the Shadows is in Darren's nature. It's almost like they're blatantly warning him, trying to get him to understand?

The entire time, Vancha and Gannen are just...there. They themselves had an epic battle before becoming injured in the fight. They both have valid roles themselves frankly. But it's assumed by many that their roles are lesser... But Mr. Tiny wouldn't just thrust a role onto Vancha and Gannen for nothing.

It's actually sort of depressing for Darren and Steve. I think this is one of Mr. Tiny's crueler tricks.

Vancha and Gannen are kinda way more experienced and honorable than Darren and Steve when you think about it. Man. Again, this series does a tremendous job at giving other characters heroic, main character energy. Fascinating!!!

Darren really proved himself though, and I'm proud of him. I'm unsure that Evanna and Darren truly tricked Mr. Tiny. I wouldn't put it past Mr. Tiny to be acting/playing 1000-D chess.

So yeah, Darren turning into a Little Person got me thinking. I'll get to what he exactly did in his time as a Little Person shortly, but I have a theory I must get off my chest here.

I think Mr. Tiny might have a genuinely good side to him? Seriously. Hear me out.

Mr. Tiny is no doubt a jerk, he's annoying, but he's not stupid, and he has displayed brief moments of a good side. He has given Darren unsolicited solid advice, especially early on in the series. He seemed genuinely unhappy when Mr. Tall died. He gave Kurda a chance at redemption....!

When reconstructing Darren as a Little Person Evanna showed this admiration for Mr. Tiny, and Mr. Tiny had this sense of pride, duty, and joy as he did his work. That moment really said a lot to me. It felt wholesome/sacred which is a unique, powerful combo.

Thinking about Kurda, then Darren, and how there's always new Little People it makes me wonder if this is Mr. Tiny's personal like, Karma/salvation redemption system? The Lake of Souls is like a prison?

I personally assumed that Kurda and Darren being fished out and becoming a Little Person was some special thing, but that's so STUPID of me. There's a lot of Little People. They're all ghosts from the Lake! Duh! But I have more ideas about that.

I tend to think that most, if not ALL the beings in the Lake eventually get a chance at Paradise. Darren stayed in for hundreds of thousands of years. So, even the worst people in there could stay in there for who knows how long. In addition, everyone's deal as a Little Person is seemingly unique. So the worst people in there could be in there for billions of years for all I know, and then when they get out have an extremely strict deal as the Little Person, who knows.

Or maybe simply not everyone gets a shot at being a Little Person. Who knows. It's just a theory.

Nevertheless, this very system may be Mr. Tiny's legitimate wholesome side. I know that might sound crazy but I feel like he works in wild ways, and Mr. Tiny has pretty much all of eternity to understand psychology and what makes humans tick. He himself is a fan of theatrics and everything. If we all agree he's cunning, and sneaky and tricky, anything is on the table regarding Mr. Tiny. Perhaps SOME of his cruelness is misleading. SOME.

It simply feels too easy to assume Darren happened to outwit Mr. Tiny. Initially, Mr. Tiny seemed so irritated about reforming Darren to a Little Person, but again that moment of wholesomeness as Evanna and Mr. Tiny put Darren together lingers in my mind. Feels like a bit of a contradiction.

Mr. Tiny seems cruel a lot, and he is. But sometimes I wonder if he's a 'pressure makes diamonds' type of dude.

Fascinating.

As I said, when Darren becomes a Little Person, he's sent back to when he sees the Cirque with Steve all those years ago.

It's such a powerful, wholesome scene man. Darren has been through so so much. As a reader and life long fan of this series, I can't tell you how trippy, and how cool it is.

I'll never forget reading that first book for the first time. Because ya know, math HA. You gotta start the series at book one ya know?

But that's still powerful. I didn't need to continue on to the next books. I didn't even need to finish the first book! But on I went. Especially since I read it when I was young, it brings me back to when things felt relatively safe. Relatively normal.

My childhood had it's up and downs. It was certainly intense. It wasn't always fun, it was often stressful, miserable. I am grateful for the good times, because there were good times but, it was REALLY not great at times as well.

So when I say thinking of that first book brings me back to a safe place, I really mean it. The environment wasn't always pleasant but I did have a roof and I was fed. I'm grateful to have had quiet enough times to read.

The book itself made me feel safe though. It was a great escape. So when Darren gets to revisit the last moment of joy before his life spiraled, I'm happy for him. He gets to see his friendship with Steve before everything went nuts. He gets to see Mr. Crepsley perform which was absolutely awesome. He gets to see Mr. Tall again.

Most importantly, Darren gets to save himself.

It's bittersweet because, the good part of his adventures go away. His memories and relationships deleted. But also, not really. They still happened. He still saved the vampires as his actions are etched into the universe. According to the rules of the Cirque Du Freak universe, the names of the characters can change, but the specific actions and events that transpired cannot be changed. Pretty deep.

Additionally, Darren wrote about his adventures in his journal. Which was very important, and unintentionally clever. The journal is of course to be published as a warning to society as well as the vampires and vampaneze, a warning about Des Tiny! That is the ultimate lesson here!!!

I think Darren also saved Steve by making sure young Darren doesn't observe Steve and Mr. Crepsley's encounter. Of course there will be another version of Steve but, it's still pretty cool Steve at least gets a chance at a different life.

Since I was bothered by Mr. Tall's death a lot more this time, I found it so cool that Darren, as a Little Person, got to get some closure with Mr. Tall! The very leader of the Cirque Du Freak itself! They shook hands!

Finally, Darren's death scene was incredibly beautiful. Darren did have some years of peace throughout his life as a half-vampire, but for the most part everything was non-stop since that first Cirque Du Freak show.

To lay on top of that movie theater where it all started, in his hometown, looking at the stars, knowing he gets to live a normal life, and knowing he did his duty as a Vampire Prince is just magnificent.

It was just a perfect way to end the series.

I thank God I got to finish this twelve book EPIC once again. I'm so sad it's over, but so glad it will always be here. ❤️

I'm about to have a significant life change in the somewhat near future when I ship out for the Navy. It means a lot that I managed to finish this amazing series one more time beforehand.

Writing about it the whole way feels great too because, there's so many exciting feelings and thoughts that rush through my mind as I read this. I don't need some grand audience either, I'm glad it simply exists.

On to The Saga of Larten Crepsley!!!